As I write this, I sit in a hotel room in Virginia at 4:30am while my husband is at his morning PT routine. Just a few days ago, I sat in a hotel room in Ruidoso, New Mexico trying to keep my mind off of missing my husband so much while he was away at training. The lightning fast switch in locations is enough to make anyone's head spin, honestly.
As an aside, I would not have been able to do this, and come to Virginia on the spur-of-the-moment if we had any children. But not to dwell on that, I didn't come here out of selfishness or for frivolous reasons. My husband missed me. A lot. It was affecting his ability to concentrate and focus on school. It affected his sense of self-confidence, and mental resiliency. I missed him, too. A lot. I was sad and depressed, moping around the empty house, and debating going to sleep at 8pm just so the days would go by faster. I guess we both needed this.
Some might call us pathetic, but our love for each other has not diminished over the years. It has grown stronger, and when separations come, they are stressful and sometimes devastating. Since this particular separation was able to be circumvented, we did so. I paid for my own transportation out here, and the hotel room price is the same whether one person or two occupies it. Meals we either pay for ourselves, or we share one if the servings are big. There is no exploitation of the government credit card, we get to be together, and my husband can focus on school and aim for honor grad.
It's 3:15am back at home. My poor dogs are probably wondering where the hell I am (my neighbor is taking care of them), and I'm sitting here hunched over a laptop in a hotel room two time zones away. Overall, I love my life and wouldn't trade a minute of it away.
Monday, July 16, 2012
Wednesday, July 11, 2012
What gives America?
I'm normally not into politics, and I don't spread my political opinions around like pollen on a windy day. Everyone has an opinion, and everyone thinks theirs is right.
That said, I won't go into politics here so much as humanity, decency, and doing the right thing. Do people really believe that fixing the country will happen magically once the rich get richer and the poor get poorer? Do they really believe that saving the country's flagging economy rests on taking things away from poor people and giving extra perks to the rich? Kind of like Robin Hood in reverse?
One of the reasons I don't usually talk about my views and opinions is because I have no solution. I believe if anyone is going to criticize our president, our government, or our society, they can only do it if they have good ideas for fixing it. Of which I have none.
I'm naive, and an idealist. I believe in everyone working together to save our future, and I believe in putting aside grudges and animosity for the greater good. There's very few of us left, though. Most people are of the school, "What's in it for me? How do I get anything out of this?" Reality TV, social networks, blogs, Youtube, and other web sites, are proof of this. Look at the comments section of any news station's website and you will always find people quick to put down anyone who doesn't share their opinion, and do it viciously.
I saw a picture someone put on Facebook, of a guy flipping two middle fingers up at as President Obama's bus rolled by them in Ohio. Really? Did your mama not teach you any kind of respect? It doesn't matter if you like the guy or not, disrespect of that kind speaks volumes about your parents and how you were raised. If you don't like the guy, vote him out. If he gets reelected, wait four years and he'll be gone. This isn't Libya where the same guy runs the country for fifty years with an iron fist.
I saw a video on Reddit the other day, of a guy hassling border patrol agents in Texas. Since I routinely drive through these checkpoints, living in Texas and working in New Mexico, it's a matter of, "Hi, are you a United States resident?", to which I say, "Yes", and the man nods and waves me on. How hard is that, seriously? Where exactly are your rights being infringed upon? They don't ask to see papers. They don't make me get out of the car while they search it. It's a 20 second blip on my drive, big freakin' deal. But the guy in the video, no he has to be a jerk (I'm refraining from using stronger words). "That's my business," he answers smugly, while secretly recording it. Obviously, the agent wasn't expecting that so he pauses for a minute and then says, "Actually, it's my business. Are you a United States resident?" And naturally, mister cocky is all like, "What is this Nazi Germany? Are you going to ask me for my papers? I don't have to prove anything to you. I'd like to go on my way now." They go back and forth, and the agent tries to get him to pull to the side, so the traffic piling up behind him can keep moving. "No, I'm not going to pull over there. I should be free to go on my way. This is America isn't it?" He was trying to say how America is a police state and we're all being harassed. I don't see how being asked a simple yes or no question is harassment, but whatever. Most of the viewers of the video felt the same as me, although he did have a few people cheering him on.
It's very obvious that this guy staged the whole thing for some notoriety. A quick look at his website shows that he also speaks out against women wearing pants, he's strongly anti-gay, and an ultra conservative Christian. He should hook up with the Westboro Baptist church and get it over with.
ANYWAY, my point is, that people being selfish, closed-minded, and arrogant know-it-alls are what is killing this country. The government isn't our enemy. The average voters are our enemy. Americans are our own worst enemies. It seriously makes me want to uproot and find another country to call home.
That said, I won't go into politics here so much as humanity, decency, and doing the right thing. Do people really believe that fixing the country will happen magically once the rich get richer and the poor get poorer? Do they really believe that saving the country's flagging economy rests on taking things away from poor people and giving extra perks to the rich? Kind of like Robin Hood in reverse?
One of the reasons I don't usually talk about my views and opinions is because I have no solution. I believe if anyone is going to criticize our president, our government, or our society, they can only do it if they have good ideas for fixing it. Of which I have none.
I'm naive, and an idealist. I believe in everyone working together to save our future, and I believe in putting aside grudges and animosity for the greater good. There's very few of us left, though. Most people are of the school, "What's in it for me? How do I get anything out of this?" Reality TV, social networks, blogs, Youtube, and other web sites, are proof of this. Look at the comments section of any news station's website and you will always find people quick to put down anyone who doesn't share their opinion, and do it viciously.
I saw a picture someone put on Facebook, of a guy flipping two middle fingers up at as President Obama's bus rolled by them in Ohio. Really? Did your mama not teach you any kind of respect? It doesn't matter if you like the guy or not, disrespect of that kind speaks volumes about your parents and how you were raised. If you don't like the guy, vote him out. If he gets reelected, wait four years and he'll be gone. This isn't Libya where the same guy runs the country for fifty years with an iron fist.
I saw a video on Reddit the other day, of a guy hassling border patrol agents in Texas. Since I routinely drive through these checkpoints, living in Texas and working in New Mexico, it's a matter of, "Hi, are you a United States resident?", to which I say, "Yes", and the man nods and waves me on. How hard is that, seriously? Where exactly are your rights being infringed upon? They don't ask to see papers. They don't make me get out of the car while they search it. It's a 20 second blip on my drive, big freakin' deal. But the guy in the video, no he has to be a jerk (I'm refraining from using stronger words). "That's my business," he answers smugly, while secretly recording it. Obviously, the agent wasn't expecting that so he pauses for a minute and then says, "Actually, it's my business. Are you a United States resident?" And naturally, mister cocky is all like, "What is this Nazi Germany? Are you going to ask me for my papers? I don't have to prove anything to you. I'd like to go on my way now." They go back and forth, and the agent tries to get him to pull to the side, so the traffic piling up behind him can keep moving. "No, I'm not going to pull over there. I should be free to go on my way. This is America isn't it?" He was trying to say how America is a police state and we're all being harassed. I don't see how being asked a simple yes or no question is harassment, but whatever. Most of the viewers of the video felt the same as me, although he did have a few people cheering him on.
It's very obvious that this guy staged the whole thing for some notoriety. A quick look at his website shows that he also speaks out against women wearing pants, he's strongly anti-gay, and an ultra conservative Christian. He should hook up with the Westboro Baptist church and get it over with.
ANYWAY, my point is, that people being selfish, closed-minded, and arrogant know-it-alls are what is killing this country. The government isn't our enemy. The average voters are our enemy. Americans are our own worst enemies. It seriously makes me want to uproot and find another country to call home.
Saturday, July 7, 2012
On My Own
My husband left two days ago for an 8 week training course in Virginia, and I'm rattling around the house kind of like a lost child at a carnival. I don't have to have certain meal times, I don't have to brush my hair, I don't have to even get out of my jammies if I don't want to. Sure it's neat to have the house to myself. For about 5 minutes.
I'm missing my husband something terrible. I have lots of time to write, read books, watch movies, play video games, do school assignments. I'd gladly trade all this freedom and "me time" to have him home, or for me to have gone with him. He's feeling the same, I know. We love to road-trip, and this is the first time he's taking one without me. Or alone at all, for that matter. He calls me a couple of times a day from the road. So far I've gotten calls from Abilene, Little Rock, and Memphis while I sit in front of my computer with a United States map on the screen and track his travels, wishing I were with him. And how pathetic does that make me?
I feel like "overly attached girlfriend", stalking his every move. I will admit I haven't taken a shower or changed out of the ratty clothes I've been wearing since he left. I did the same when he left for Iraq a few years ago. It takes me a couple of days of wallowing in sadness and depression, then I snap out of it before I sink too far. I only just realized today is Saturday, for Chrissake.
So today I'll shower, and change into clean clothes. I'll get in the car and go somewhere, just to get some sunshine and fresh air. When I get back home, I'll sit and write another chapter of my book and I'll feel some sense of accomplishment. Then it'll be what...noon? Yeah, I can see how these eight weeks are gonna go.
I'm missing my husband something terrible. I have lots of time to write, read books, watch movies, play video games, do school assignments. I'd gladly trade all this freedom and "me time" to have him home, or for me to have gone with him. He's feeling the same, I know. We love to road-trip, and this is the first time he's taking one without me. Or alone at all, for that matter. He calls me a couple of times a day from the road. So far I've gotten calls from Abilene, Little Rock, and Memphis while I sit in front of my computer with a United States map on the screen and track his travels, wishing I were with him. And how pathetic does that make me?
I feel like "overly attached girlfriend", stalking his every move. I will admit I haven't taken a shower or changed out of the ratty clothes I've been wearing since he left. I did the same when he left for Iraq a few years ago. It takes me a couple of days of wallowing in sadness and depression, then I snap out of it before I sink too far. I only just realized today is Saturday, for Chrissake.
So today I'll shower, and change into clean clothes. I'll get in the car and go somewhere, just to get some sunshine and fresh air. When I get back home, I'll sit and write another chapter of my book and I'll feel some sense of accomplishment. Then it'll be what...noon? Yeah, I can see how these eight weeks are gonna go.
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