Such is the life of a military family. We are moving back to Fort Lewis in Washington in the next few months. I couldn't be happier about this, though. I have hated El Paso with a burning passion that I can't even explain. I've never hated anything so much as living in this desert town on the edge of Mexico. Within the next few months, I will be back where it rains. Where the trees and grass aren't brown and prickly. Where the wind doesn't blow ten pounds of dirt through your window sills to decorate the floors and furniture. Where I can open the window and enjoy a breeze at night when I go to sleep without dirt blowing in my face. It's beautiful outside at night in October in El Paso, but we still have the air conditioner running because if we open the window, we get dirt all over our bed.
We can't let the dogs outside for long in the summer for fear of something on the ground biting them. Tara had a spider bite last spring, most likely a brown recluse, that ate away at her flesh and left a gaping hole in her side for three months. In the fall, the dogs go outside to pee, five minutes, and they come limping back in and I have to pull a bunch of stickers out of the paws. You know, those stickers that stick to socks and pants if you walk in the woods. Woods smoods. Those stickers are part of our lawn, both front and back yard. We tried once...once...to take our dogs for a hike. Thought we'd find a park with some grass, or someplace with shade trees where we could hike. Franklin Mountains sounded promising. We went there, and found the only trees were squat cactus, and the mountain itself was literally rocks, with a path of smaller rocks bordered by rough weeds. We twisted our ankles every hundred or so feet, and the dogs kept losing their balance. We were hot, tired, sore, and sweaty inside of thirty minutes. So much for a morning hike.
So, have I made it clear yet, just how nasty living here is? I can't wait to leave!
Wednesday, October 17, 2012
Thursday, October 4, 2012
The life of a perpetual dieter
So, I've been doing the yo-yo, gaining, losing, gaining, etc. for the past few years, but I think I've figured out the right way to go about permanent weight loss.
One thing I am good at is seeing patterns. So I began to see my eating patterns, what I was doing to myself, and why. I decided to try Atkins again. I'd done it before, years ago, but as I said, when you move a lot, you tend to toss your routines and habits out the window when it comes to road trip eating.
So about a month ago, I went on Atkins. It stuck for about a week. Lost 6 pounds in that week. Then on the 8th day, 3 pounds were back. So naturally I said, "Screw this!" and went back to my old ways.
BUT (there's always a big butt in there, right?) After going back to my old ways, it occurred to me that I'd felt pretty good while on the low carb diet. I wasn't plagued by lots of gas (apparently too many carbs make me gassy), my ankles hadn't swelled in a week, and I drank more water without even realizing it. Those are pretty good clues, aren't they? I thought so. I went back one more time.
I found a support site dedicated to ketogenic diets, and found all sorts of videos from doctors explaining why low carb is good for you. Two doctors in particular explained why and how this works in very simple to understand terms. One was Dr. Mary Vernon (a former president of the American Society of Bariatric Physicians) and one was Dr. Eric Westman (current president of the American Society of Bariatric Physicians). Search for them on Youtube for some good explanations.
So anyway, I've been back on low carb for only 4 days this time. I've bypassed Atkins, because I think those bars and shakes they sell are probably not the best to include in a low carb diet. Since Dr. Atkins died, the brand is just a business with no personal investment. Someone is just making money off his name, and I'd rather not support that. But, I digress.
In the four days since I started again, I've lost four pounds, I'm actually eating less calories than before without measuring or weighing any food, I'm consuming a lot more fat than ever before and not dumping (those who have had gastric bypass don't need dumping explained). This is a big one, because I've been increasingly sensitive to dumping syndrome as the post-op years go by, and now I'm not dumping at all even though the fat I'm consuming has increased by a LOT.
The overall best part of this though, and this is what's going to keep me on this path towards a healthy weight; I'm not hungry. Let me just say that louder. I'M NOT HUNGRY. Not even a little, between meals. Every diet I've ever been on has left me feeling hungry, starving in fact, half way between meals. Breakfast at 7:30am? I'm hungry and craving ANYTHING by 10am. Snack at 10am? I'm starving by lunch time at 12. It continues through the day, and if I'm hungry, I eat. If I'm not hungry, I don't eat. Simple.
This way of life isn't for everyone. It's hard to break a lifetime of habits and "learning". Consider this though. The food pyramid recommends that 50% of your daily intake come from carbohydrates. FIFTY PERCENT. At the same time, the number of obese people in this country has skyrocketed. Mostly since the food pyramid was revised. The USDA can't recommend the same thing for every person in the country. We're all different. Keep looking for the way that is right for you.
Wednesday, September 26, 2012
I hate politics
WARNING: Rant incoming
Normally, I say I keep my opinions on politics to myself, discussing it only with my husband. There are too many people out there with differing opinions and ideas on how things should be done, and I dislike the idea of friends being alienated by those opinions. It also occurred to me that my posts here are sometimes about politics, so I guess I don't keep my opinions to myself as much as I thought.
With that, on to the rant.
The idea of moving to another country has become more and more appealing. Originally, I thought Canada (and that's still an option since my husband is a dual citizen), but I am very aware that the grass is not necessarily greener north of the border. Or anywhere, for that matter. Politics and power equals corruption and greed no matter where you live.
With the election season in full swing, and media outlets, social networks, and every nook and cranny of the country blasting their opinions for all to hear, I'm becoming embarrassed to be an American. I used to be very proud to be a natural born citizen of the United States. Now it feels more like I'm a member of a sideshow at a three-ring circus.
Romney is bad for this country. Republicans who are STILL reeling over the fact that a black man was elected president, are bad for this country. It's not like we're electing a dictator or a king who will have absolute rule for the next fifty years. I watch, and I listen, everyday...to people who will do anything, say anything, vote for anyone, just to get the black man out of the white house. They are willfully dragging our economy into the toilet just so they can say it's the president's fault. They try and rig elections, grind their boot-heels into the backs of the poor and elderly to keep them from voting, and try taking away what little the poor have.
AND they call themselves Christians! The hypocrisy is astounding! All of these so-called dyed-in-the-wool red states, are filled with poor folks, uneducated folks, hard working individuals that Romney considers worthless and "not his job to worry about". And they'll stomp their way to the voting booth to vote for him, because he's a white guy, and for no other reason. Seniors will drag their tired bodies to the voting booth to vote for him, even though he and his running mate are boasting about GETTING RID OF SOCIAL SECURITY AND MEDICARE. HELLO! So many retirees didn't have jobs that allowed them to sock away multiple IRAs to live on into retirement. So many of them only have social security and nothing else to survive on. I just don't get it.
I did vote for Obama last election. And I felt he could have done some good if the scared white guys didn't decide to have a temper tantrum and make their priority getting him out next term, instead of working with him to fix the country.
I'm considering voting libertarian, or a write-in this time, simple because I don't think that the Republicans will work with him to fix things any more than last time. I might have voted for Ron Paul had he won the nomination, and I think, again, that the media did a butcher job on him to put Romney in the lead. Betcha they are regretting that now.
I may vote for Obama again, just to keep Romney out of office. It's a crappy reason to vote for someone, and I'm betting that will be the reason for a good chunk of Obama's votes this time around. I haven't decided yet who I'll vote for, but one thing is for sure. I WILL vote. And you should too.
Normally, I say I keep my opinions on politics to myself, discussing it only with my husband. There are too many people out there with differing opinions and ideas on how things should be done, and I dislike the idea of friends being alienated by those opinions. It also occurred to me that my posts here are sometimes about politics, so I guess I don't keep my opinions to myself as much as I thought.
With that, on to the rant.
The idea of moving to another country has become more and more appealing. Originally, I thought Canada (and that's still an option since my husband is a dual citizen), but I am very aware that the grass is not necessarily greener north of the border. Or anywhere, for that matter. Politics and power equals corruption and greed no matter where you live.
With the election season in full swing, and media outlets, social networks, and every nook and cranny of the country blasting their opinions for all to hear, I'm becoming embarrassed to be an American. I used to be very proud to be a natural born citizen of the United States. Now it feels more like I'm a member of a sideshow at a three-ring circus.
Romney is bad for this country. Republicans who are STILL reeling over the fact that a black man was elected president, are bad for this country. It's not like we're electing a dictator or a king who will have absolute rule for the next fifty years. I watch, and I listen, everyday...to people who will do anything, say anything, vote for anyone, just to get the black man out of the white house. They are willfully dragging our economy into the toilet just so they can say it's the president's fault. They try and rig elections, grind their boot-heels into the backs of the poor and elderly to keep them from voting, and try taking away what little the poor have.
AND they call themselves Christians! The hypocrisy is astounding! All of these so-called dyed-in-the-wool red states, are filled with poor folks, uneducated folks, hard working individuals that Romney considers worthless and "not his job to worry about". And they'll stomp their way to the voting booth to vote for him, because he's a white guy, and for no other reason. Seniors will drag their tired bodies to the voting booth to vote for him, even though he and his running mate are boasting about GETTING RID OF SOCIAL SECURITY AND MEDICARE. HELLO! So many retirees didn't have jobs that allowed them to sock away multiple IRAs to live on into retirement. So many of them only have social security and nothing else to survive on. I just don't get it.
I did vote for Obama last election. And I felt he could have done some good if the scared white guys didn't decide to have a temper tantrum and make their priority getting him out next term, instead of working with him to fix the country.
I'm considering voting libertarian, or a write-in this time, simple because I don't think that the Republicans will work with him to fix things any more than last time. I might have voted for Ron Paul had he won the nomination, and I think, again, that the media did a butcher job on him to put Romney in the lead. Betcha they are regretting that now.
I may vote for Obama again, just to keep Romney out of office. It's a crappy reason to vote for someone, and I'm betting that will be the reason for a good chunk of Obama's votes this time around. I haven't decided yet who I'll vote for, but one thing is for sure. I WILL vote. And you should too.
Monday, July 16, 2012
Spontaneous travel plans
As I write this, I sit in a hotel room in Virginia at 4:30am while my husband is at his morning PT routine. Just a few days ago, I sat in a hotel room in Ruidoso, New Mexico trying to keep my mind off of missing my husband so much while he was away at training. The lightning fast switch in locations is enough to make anyone's head spin, honestly.
As an aside, I would not have been able to do this, and come to Virginia on the spur-of-the-moment if we had any children. But not to dwell on that, I didn't come here out of selfishness or for frivolous reasons. My husband missed me. A lot. It was affecting his ability to concentrate and focus on school. It affected his sense of self-confidence, and mental resiliency. I missed him, too. A lot. I was sad and depressed, moping around the empty house, and debating going to sleep at 8pm just so the days would go by faster. I guess we both needed this.
Some might call us pathetic, but our love for each other has not diminished over the years. It has grown stronger, and when separations come, they are stressful and sometimes devastating. Since this particular separation was able to be circumvented, we did so. I paid for my own transportation out here, and the hotel room price is the same whether one person or two occupies it. Meals we either pay for ourselves, or we share one if the servings are big. There is no exploitation of the government credit card, we get to be together, and my husband can focus on school and aim for honor grad.
It's 3:15am back at home. My poor dogs are probably wondering where the hell I am (my neighbor is taking care of them), and I'm sitting here hunched over a laptop in a hotel room two time zones away. Overall, I love my life and wouldn't trade a minute of it away.
As an aside, I would not have been able to do this, and come to Virginia on the spur-of-the-moment if we had any children. But not to dwell on that, I didn't come here out of selfishness or for frivolous reasons. My husband missed me. A lot. It was affecting his ability to concentrate and focus on school. It affected his sense of self-confidence, and mental resiliency. I missed him, too. A lot. I was sad and depressed, moping around the empty house, and debating going to sleep at 8pm just so the days would go by faster. I guess we both needed this.
Some might call us pathetic, but our love for each other has not diminished over the years. It has grown stronger, and when separations come, they are stressful and sometimes devastating. Since this particular separation was able to be circumvented, we did so. I paid for my own transportation out here, and the hotel room price is the same whether one person or two occupies it. Meals we either pay for ourselves, or we share one if the servings are big. There is no exploitation of the government credit card, we get to be together, and my husband can focus on school and aim for honor grad.
It's 3:15am back at home. My poor dogs are probably wondering where the hell I am (my neighbor is taking care of them), and I'm sitting here hunched over a laptop in a hotel room two time zones away. Overall, I love my life and wouldn't trade a minute of it away.
Wednesday, July 11, 2012
What gives America?
I'm normally not into politics, and I don't spread my political opinions around like pollen on a windy day. Everyone has an opinion, and everyone thinks theirs is right.
That said, I won't go into politics here so much as humanity, decency, and doing the right thing. Do people really believe that fixing the country will happen magically once the rich get richer and the poor get poorer? Do they really believe that saving the country's flagging economy rests on taking things away from poor people and giving extra perks to the rich? Kind of like Robin Hood in reverse?
One of the reasons I don't usually talk about my views and opinions is because I have no solution. I believe if anyone is going to criticize our president, our government, or our society, they can only do it if they have good ideas for fixing it. Of which I have none.
I'm naive, and an idealist. I believe in everyone working together to save our future, and I believe in putting aside grudges and animosity for the greater good. There's very few of us left, though. Most people are of the school, "What's in it for me? How do I get anything out of this?" Reality TV, social networks, blogs, Youtube, and other web sites, are proof of this. Look at the comments section of any news station's website and you will always find people quick to put down anyone who doesn't share their opinion, and do it viciously.
I saw a picture someone put on Facebook, of a guy flipping two middle fingers up at as President Obama's bus rolled by them in Ohio. Really? Did your mama not teach you any kind of respect? It doesn't matter if you like the guy or not, disrespect of that kind speaks volumes about your parents and how you were raised. If you don't like the guy, vote him out. If he gets reelected, wait four years and he'll be gone. This isn't Libya where the same guy runs the country for fifty years with an iron fist.
I saw a video on Reddit the other day, of a guy hassling border patrol agents in Texas. Since I routinely drive through these checkpoints, living in Texas and working in New Mexico, it's a matter of, "Hi, are you a United States resident?", to which I say, "Yes", and the man nods and waves me on. How hard is that, seriously? Where exactly are your rights being infringed upon? They don't ask to see papers. They don't make me get out of the car while they search it. It's a 20 second blip on my drive, big freakin' deal. But the guy in the video, no he has to be a jerk (I'm refraining from using stronger words). "That's my business," he answers smugly, while secretly recording it. Obviously, the agent wasn't expecting that so he pauses for a minute and then says, "Actually, it's my business. Are you a United States resident?" And naturally, mister cocky is all like, "What is this Nazi Germany? Are you going to ask me for my papers? I don't have to prove anything to you. I'd like to go on my way now." They go back and forth, and the agent tries to get him to pull to the side, so the traffic piling up behind him can keep moving. "No, I'm not going to pull over there. I should be free to go on my way. This is America isn't it?" He was trying to say how America is a police state and we're all being harassed. I don't see how being asked a simple yes or no question is harassment, but whatever. Most of the viewers of the video felt the same as me, although he did have a few people cheering him on.
It's very obvious that this guy staged the whole thing for some notoriety. A quick look at his website shows that he also speaks out against women wearing pants, he's strongly anti-gay, and an ultra conservative Christian. He should hook up with the Westboro Baptist church and get it over with.
ANYWAY, my point is, that people being selfish, closed-minded, and arrogant know-it-alls are what is killing this country. The government isn't our enemy. The average voters are our enemy. Americans are our own worst enemies. It seriously makes me want to uproot and find another country to call home.
That said, I won't go into politics here so much as humanity, decency, and doing the right thing. Do people really believe that fixing the country will happen magically once the rich get richer and the poor get poorer? Do they really believe that saving the country's flagging economy rests on taking things away from poor people and giving extra perks to the rich? Kind of like Robin Hood in reverse?
One of the reasons I don't usually talk about my views and opinions is because I have no solution. I believe if anyone is going to criticize our president, our government, or our society, they can only do it if they have good ideas for fixing it. Of which I have none.
I'm naive, and an idealist. I believe in everyone working together to save our future, and I believe in putting aside grudges and animosity for the greater good. There's very few of us left, though. Most people are of the school, "What's in it for me? How do I get anything out of this?" Reality TV, social networks, blogs, Youtube, and other web sites, are proof of this. Look at the comments section of any news station's website and you will always find people quick to put down anyone who doesn't share their opinion, and do it viciously.
I saw a picture someone put on Facebook, of a guy flipping two middle fingers up at as President Obama's bus rolled by them in Ohio. Really? Did your mama not teach you any kind of respect? It doesn't matter if you like the guy or not, disrespect of that kind speaks volumes about your parents and how you were raised. If you don't like the guy, vote him out. If he gets reelected, wait four years and he'll be gone. This isn't Libya where the same guy runs the country for fifty years with an iron fist.
I saw a video on Reddit the other day, of a guy hassling border patrol agents in Texas. Since I routinely drive through these checkpoints, living in Texas and working in New Mexico, it's a matter of, "Hi, are you a United States resident?", to which I say, "Yes", and the man nods and waves me on. How hard is that, seriously? Where exactly are your rights being infringed upon? They don't ask to see papers. They don't make me get out of the car while they search it. It's a 20 second blip on my drive, big freakin' deal. But the guy in the video, no he has to be a jerk (I'm refraining from using stronger words). "That's my business," he answers smugly, while secretly recording it. Obviously, the agent wasn't expecting that so he pauses for a minute and then says, "Actually, it's my business. Are you a United States resident?" And naturally, mister cocky is all like, "What is this Nazi Germany? Are you going to ask me for my papers? I don't have to prove anything to you. I'd like to go on my way now." They go back and forth, and the agent tries to get him to pull to the side, so the traffic piling up behind him can keep moving. "No, I'm not going to pull over there. I should be free to go on my way. This is America isn't it?" He was trying to say how America is a police state and we're all being harassed. I don't see how being asked a simple yes or no question is harassment, but whatever. Most of the viewers of the video felt the same as me, although he did have a few people cheering him on.
It's very obvious that this guy staged the whole thing for some notoriety. A quick look at his website shows that he also speaks out against women wearing pants, he's strongly anti-gay, and an ultra conservative Christian. He should hook up with the Westboro Baptist church and get it over with.
ANYWAY, my point is, that people being selfish, closed-minded, and arrogant know-it-alls are what is killing this country. The government isn't our enemy. The average voters are our enemy. Americans are our own worst enemies. It seriously makes me want to uproot and find another country to call home.
Saturday, July 7, 2012
On My Own
My husband left two days ago for an 8 week training course in Virginia, and I'm rattling around the house kind of like a lost child at a carnival. I don't have to have certain meal times, I don't have to brush my hair, I don't have to even get out of my jammies if I don't want to. Sure it's neat to have the house to myself. For about 5 minutes.
I'm missing my husband something terrible. I have lots of time to write, read books, watch movies, play video games, do school assignments. I'd gladly trade all this freedom and "me time" to have him home, or for me to have gone with him. He's feeling the same, I know. We love to road-trip, and this is the first time he's taking one without me. Or alone at all, for that matter. He calls me a couple of times a day from the road. So far I've gotten calls from Abilene, Little Rock, and Memphis while I sit in front of my computer with a United States map on the screen and track his travels, wishing I were with him. And how pathetic does that make me?
I feel like "overly attached girlfriend", stalking his every move. I will admit I haven't taken a shower or changed out of the ratty clothes I've been wearing since he left. I did the same when he left for Iraq a few years ago. It takes me a couple of days of wallowing in sadness and depression, then I snap out of it before I sink too far. I only just realized today is Saturday, for Chrissake.
So today I'll shower, and change into clean clothes. I'll get in the car and go somewhere, just to get some sunshine and fresh air. When I get back home, I'll sit and write another chapter of my book and I'll feel some sense of accomplishment. Then it'll be what...noon? Yeah, I can see how these eight weeks are gonna go.
I'm missing my husband something terrible. I have lots of time to write, read books, watch movies, play video games, do school assignments. I'd gladly trade all this freedom and "me time" to have him home, or for me to have gone with him. He's feeling the same, I know. We love to road-trip, and this is the first time he's taking one without me. Or alone at all, for that matter. He calls me a couple of times a day from the road. So far I've gotten calls from Abilene, Little Rock, and Memphis while I sit in front of my computer with a United States map on the screen and track his travels, wishing I were with him. And how pathetic does that make me?
I feel like "overly attached girlfriend", stalking his every move. I will admit I haven't taken a shower or changed out of the ratty clothes I've been wearing since he left. I did the same when he left for Iraq a few years ago. It takes me a couple of days of wallowing in sadness and depression, then I snap out of it before I sink too far. I only just realized today is Saturday, for Chrissake.
So today I'll shower, and change into clean clothes. I'll get in the car and go somewhere, just to get some sunshine and fresh air. When I get back home, I'll sit and write another chapter of my book and I'll feel some sense of accomplishment. Then it'll be what...noon? Yeah, I can see how these eight weeks are gonna go.
Tuesday, June 12, 2012
Time flies when you're having fun
It's been over a year since I last wrote. That should tell you how hectic that job was. Yup, was. As in, no longer. I finally couldn't take any more, no matter how much I liked my boss or the people I worked with, that job was going to kill me. I'm just glad I saw the writing on the wall and got the hell out of Dodge.
I can't even begin to accurately describe the hectic idiocy of that job, and the couple who own the place and hand down the mandates. The biggest challenge was trying to run that hotel despite the owners ludicrous demands. I hope my (former) boss muddles through until her husband gets his PCS orders and they....get the hell out of Dodge.
Anyway, my return to unemployed status gives me time to concentrate on a few things. First, my writing-and second, my weight. I did lose weight on the job, I'll say that much. But that was only because there was never time to eat! My health declined even as the weight went down. It really was a terrible situation.
I've debated back and forth on trying a new diet, or getting in touch with a surgeon to revise my gastric bypass as options. I've decided, for now at least, to go back on Atkins and see if that helps at all. I know fad diets and yada yada, bullshit, etc. but since I have a very real addiction to carbs, I am kind of hoping that if I can stick to Atkins for a while, it'll help break that addiction. I'm on day 3, as of this writing, and 2 pounds gone already. Time will tell though, I've failed nearly everything else, even surgery for God's sake.
And then the writing. I've been working on a couple of things simultaneously while going to school, and my next two classes are Spanish, and won't that be fun?! I've gotten back into my stories, with some ideas for new ones rumbling around in my head, I just need some organization to get them straight and take small bites. If I don't get overwhelmed, I could be done with more than one book in a year. Time will tell on that, too.
Next time I write here won't be another year down the road, promise!
I can't even begin to accurately describe the hectic idiocy of that job, and the couple who own the place and hand down the mandates. The biggest challenge was trying to run that hotel despite the owners ludicrous demands. I hope my (former) boss muddles through until her husband gets his PCS orders and they....get the hell out of Dodge.
Anyway, my return to unemployed status gives me time to concentrate on a few things. First, my writing-and second, my weight. I did lose weight on the job, I'll say that much. But that was only because there was never time to eat! My health declined even as the weight went down. It really was a terrible situation.
I've debated back and forth on trying a new diet, or getting in touch with a surgeon to revise my gastric bypass as options. I've decided, for now at least, to go back on Atkins and see if that helps at all. I know fad diets and yada yada, bullshit, etc. but since I have a very real addiction to carbs, I am kind of hoping that if I can stick to Atkins for a while, it'll help break that addiction. I'm on day 3, as of this writing, and 2 pounds gone already. Time will tell though, I've failed nearly everything else, even surgery for God's sake.
And then the writing. I've been working on a couple of things simultaneously while going to school, and my next two classes are Spanish, and won't that be fun?! I've gotten back into my stories, with some ideas for new ones rumbling around in my head, I just need some organization to get them straight and take small bites. If I don't get overwhelmed, I could be done with more than one book in a year. Time will tell on that, too.
Next time I write here won't be another year down the road, promise!
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